We are speaking on St. Paul’s signs of love working
in the soul; and we are using St. Alphonsus Liguori’s work “The
Practice of the Love of Jesus Christ” to help outline these sermons on
the signs of love. Last week we presented: “Love is Patient”;
this week we present: “Love is Kind.”
St. Alphonsus explains this mark of love: “Those who love Jesus Christ
love gentleness.”
St. Alphonsus identifies those who have the spirit of gentleness this
way,
“Souls that love God love all those whom God loves, that is our
neighbors, so that they seek to help everyone, to console everyone,
and, as far as they can, to make everyone happy.”
St. Francis de Sales obliges everyone to practice a “humble gentleness”
defined by his rule:
“When you see that something can be done with love, do it; and when you
see it cannot be done without quarreling, abandon it.” This
means, St. Alphonsus says, that we refrain from quarrels in so far as
we can without offending God because “any offense against God must
always be prevented, and as quickly as possible, by someone who is
bound to prevent it.”
St. Alphonsus says we must be gentle especially to the poor and the
sick; but also especially to our foes. “Do not be overcome by
evil, but over come evil with good.” (Rm 12:21) And he reminds us that
the saints overcame hatred by love, and persecution by gentleness, and
thus won over their most stubborn enemies; St. Francis de Sales asserts
that nothing better edifies our neighbor as loving kindness.
St. Alphonsus warns us not to limit our gentleness to those outside our
homes citing St. Francis de Sales lamentation, “there are some who are
angels outside the house, but demons at home.”
It is St. Alphonsus conviction that superiors should use every kindness
towards those beneath them. In telling others what to do, the
saint says, “they should request rather than command.”
St. Vincent de Paul makes a similar remark, “There is no better way for
superiors to be better obeyed by their subordinates than through
gentleness.” St. Jane Frances de Chantal discovered the same thing, “I
have tried many methods of governing, but I have found none better than
gentleness and tolerance.”
Superiors should be kind when delivering corrections. A forceful
rebuke, however, is not the same as a harsh rebuke. Sometimes a
firm correction is needed - when the fault is serious or a repeated
offense - but such a correction should not be given in harshness or
anger. St. Alphonsus says, “the person who chides in anger does
more harm than good.”
However, on rare occasion, there might be reason for a harsh rebuke -
to make the offender know the gravity of his crime - but, St. Alphonsus
says, “the offender should always be left with a gentle
expression and a few kind words.” St. Francis de Sales teaches
the same thing we he writes, “Just as oil always swims on the surface
of all other liquids, so must gentleness cover all our actions.”
In governing his congregation, St. Vincent de Paul made harsh
corrections only three times, and only when he thought useful; however,
as each case ended badly, he always regretted those corrections whereas
with gentleness he always succeeded.
Gentleness is also a choice weapon of winning converts to God.
St. Vincent says, “affability, love, and humility are wonderfully
effective in winning the hearts of men, and in prevailing on them to
embrace the things most repugnant to nature.”
Once he placed a hardened sinner in the care of one of his fellow
priests hoping that he would win him over to God. After much
effort, the priest gave up and begged Fr. Vincent’s help. St.
Vincent addressed the man with a few words and immediately won him
over. Later, the sinner admitted that he could not resist Fr.
Vincent’s kindness and charity.
For these reasons, St. Vincent forbade his missionaries to treat
sinners harshly because, as he lamented, “the devil exploits the
strictness of some priests to work the greater ruin of souls.”
St. Paul teaches that Love is kind; St. Alphonsus says those who love
Jesus Christ love gentleness. This gentleness should be practiced
toward everyone, always, and everywhere.
But our experience may be different. St. Bernard observes that
there are certain persons who are very gentle when things go their way,
but as soon as someone opposes them, or contradicts their argument,
they instantly flare up and begin to smoke like Mount Vesuvius.
Against this fault, St. Alphonsus instructs us to be like the lily
among thorns, which, “however much it is pricked by them, never ceases
to be a lily; that is, it is always equally sweet and kind.”
To be a lily among thorns, so is the gentle soul that loves
Jesus. St. Alphonsus says those souls who wholly love God always
maintain peace of heart; in prosperity or adversity, their faces are
always calm and serene. Drawing this point out, he cites a
poem Card. Pier Matteo Petrucci,
The soul sees how creatures change
Their varied forms outside,
But within, the deepest core
Lives ever united and at one with God.
Finally, St. Alphonsus says we must be gentle, not just with others but
even ourselves. If we commit a wrong and burn with anger at
ourselves, this is not humility, but a subtle form of pride... for, as
the saint says, “did we not know already that we are a weak and
wretched creature?” St. Teresa of Avila says, “The humility that
unsettles comes not from God but the devil.”
Now that ends St. Alphonsus’ explanation of ‘Love is Kind’; those who
love Jesus Christ love gentleness.
Earlier, St. Paul summed all this in his letter to Titus which directed
him how to lead his flock,
“Admonish them to be subject to princes and powers, to obey at a word,
to be ready to every good work. To speak evil of no man; not to
be contentious, but gentle, showing all mildness to all men. (Ti 3:2)
The next article is, “Love is not jealous,” which St. Alphonsus
explains, “The soul that loves Jesus Christ does not envy the great
ones of this world, but only those who are greater lovers of Jesus
Christ.” We shall likely pick this up after the Feast of Christ
the King.